When I was growing up, it felt like every yard had Arborvitaes growing in them. They were mostly planted to act as a hedge or fence. I was not a fan. I preferred variety and more color.
Then I met Arborvitae, also known as Northern White Cedar, during my Plant Spirit Healing training and everything changed. Cedar and I entered into a deep Love affair. So much so that I would turn into a star-eyed school girl whenever we worked together.
The other day I was doing work for a client and called on the Plant Spirit of Cedar. When Cedar joined us, I had to pause with tears of gratitude. I work with the Plant Spirits almost every day, it is my normal to experience their incredible gifts. And yet, I will admit, sometimes I forget just how special this is.
On that day, I could feel my Love for Cedar so deeply. I also really felt how the Plants have our backs. They are there to support us in ways that we can only begin to imagine. It is a true blessing to witness and experience this.
I want to be clear, while my work insures that I interact with Plant Spirits frequently, their gifts are not shrouded in some deep mystery, only available to a select few. We all have the capability to communicate with them and receive their guidance and support. We simply need to remember that this is possible and take the time to connect.
While we may look at Arborvitae simply as a fast grower who quickly provides privacy, ki has been revered long before the colonists arrived. Cedar’s life-giving medicine, both physically and spiritually, helped to keep many alive especially during the cold, dark winters when most Plants return underground.
This incredible Tree is known by many names, Nookomis-glizhik (Anishinaabe), Arborvitae, Grandmother Cedar, the Tree of Life, Thuja occidentalis, Northern White Cedar . . . I know this particular Tree (pictured) as Terre.
Five years ago I held a Cedar Plant Initiation here. As part of this Ceremony, we planted this Tree. We recently had to move the Tree and I was reminded of Terre’s story.
Terre had been following my work and writing to me for a while before I met her in person during the Summer of 2018. As I greeted her that first time, she began to cry tears of joy. She told me that she felt alone and different for most of her life. She also tended to take care of everyone else, ignoring her own needs and desires. This pattern left her with illnesses and other physical issues to the point that she could no longer continue with it. Terre retired and was wanting to live the life her Heart was longing for.
Terre cried when she met me because she resonated so deeply with my work, especially communicating with Plants. She always knew that there was more to life, but didn’t know how to explore this. Finding me felt like a lifeline, someone who understood. After years of depression and grief, she was excited about life and wanted to experience it all.
Terre really wanted to go to Damanhur with me that fall, but decided to wait until the next opportunity due to some medical issues. She did, however, join us for the Cedar Initiation. It was nothing like what she had experienced before and she reveled in every minute. She was so ecstatic to be in a community of people who were engaged in creating a better world and connected with Nature Spirits and the Unseen. Finally, she had proof that she was not alone nor was she too different. She was just right with an enormous, beautiful, generous Heart.
So magical was this experience for Terre, that she immediately signed up for the HEARTransformation Apprenticeship. I reached out to her a couple months later and did not get a response. I tried again several times and then discovered that she died suddenly a week or so before. My heart broke. Terre waited a lifetime to find the community that she longed for. On one hand, I find this to be so sad and yet, Terre was also brave enough to reach out and explore, to shift the pattern that was causing her pain.
I felt that one of the best ways that I could honor Terre and her bravery was to name our Ceremonial Cedar after her. Now whenever I think of Terre the person or see Terre the Tree, I hear the question, “What are you waiting for?” I then wonder if there is anything in my life that I feel is missing or want to explore and am not. Is there something that I’m longing to experience?
For me, Terre (the Tree) is a reminder of the shortness of life and to make the most of the time that I get to experience this incredible world. I sometimes feel sad that Terre (the person) did not get to experience the HEARTransformation Apprenticeship. I know that she would have enjoyed being in community, connecting with the Plant Spirits, and engaging with the Unseen world. Of course, Terre’s journey went another way. And I’m grateful that she did get to experience being seen and honored for the beautiful Soul that she is. (Cedar helps us transition to the other world and supports us in grief.)
This special time when we honor both the Light returning and the ending of another year is a great opportunity to reflect on our lives and experiences and ponder if there is something that our Heart is longing for or if something is holding us back from truly experiencing life and our dreams.
What are you waiting for?
May your Light shine bright and may you remember that you are Love(d).