Healing Homesickness: 9 Practices for Belonging

Before there was tartan, Scottish clans identified themselves with a sprig of a Plant placed either in their bonnet or their sash, known as Plant badges. Learning about Plant badges touched something deep in my core, like awakening an ancient memory, my ancestors had a Plant ally. Identifying oneself with a sprig of a Plant is an obvious way to recognize one’s clan. More importantly, this is a way of carrying Home with you wherever you went, honoring your innate connection to the Land.

Sacred Connection with Nature

Of course, the Scots are not the only ones who identified themselves with a Plant, Indigenous peoples around the world identify with a Plant, Animal, or other aspect of Nature. In The Unlikely Peace of Cuchumaquic: The Parallel Lives of People as Plants, Martín Prechtel tells how the Tz’utujil Maya consider themselves to be Corn people. For our ancestors, being in close connection with the Land was essential for survival. 

The invention of agriculture enabled our ancestors to settle, no longer needing to roam to follow the harvests. Suddenly, the well-being of your family was tied to the well-being of the Land. Ceremonies were held to connect with the Land and Nature Spirits to ensure a good harvest. Temples, standing stones, stone circles, and other structures were created to connect with the Divine and enhance the energies of the Land, in the hopes of supporting the family and community.

In modern society, many of these traditions have been lost or forgotten. Few of the temples and sacred sites remain intact. Sometimes they were dismantled and the stones were used for roads or houses. The people have left their Lands, through choice or force. Many of the languages have gone extinct or are near extinction, often by force. In other words, the sacred connection between the Land and ki’s people has been severed.

Definition of Ki: an animistic, genderless third person pronoun which recognizes the aliveness of our more-than-human kin. The plural is kin. To the best of my knowledge, in her book Braiding Sweetgrass, Robin Wall Kimmerer was the first to suggest using ki/kin.

What is Homesickness?

This separation has had a great impact on humanity’s well-being. My clients and students often have a sense of longing that can’t really be named or identified, but there is a sense that something is missing. I too have felt this longing. I call it homesickness. 

Homesickness can result in a deep sadness, a feeling of being uprooted or that you don’t belong. The Gaelic word for this is cianalas (pronounced kee-an-uh-luss), a deep ache for a place you may never return to or may never even have known. We are homesick for the place where our roots lie, grieving the sense of belonging. I think of homesickness as a phantom limb. We can’t see or touch it, but we can feel the ache. We try to fill this longing in many different ways, but often it continues. 

Learning about mass migrations and witnessing modern migrants fleeing their Lands in hopes of a better, safer life, we can understand the pain of homesickness. Though rarely do we consider the impact of separation on the Land.

The Land Misses Us

Land holds memory including those of trauma and grief. As I travel and connect with Nature, I often hear the message that the Land misses ki’s people. Most recently while connecting with a Forest on the Isle of Bute in Scotland, I saw an image of people moving around the island via cars and ferries. The Forest said, “While there are plenty of people around, they are moving too fast and not truly connecting with the Land.” The Land is missing people who take the time to sit, to listen, to be nourished, to sing, to dance, to celebrate, and of course, to nourish and honor the Land in return.

Humans are an inherent part of Nature. We have a sacred role as do our more-than-human kin. It is this role, this relationship that the Isle of Bute was missing. People are frequently moved to tears when they realize that the Land misses them. These tears are the acknowledgement of the unnamed longing we have been carrying, the ache being soothed. For my students, this experience often occurs when they connect with their first Plant ally as they discover, to their amazement, that this Plant wants to be in relationship with them. Nature is calling us back into relationship. Wanting us to come Home. Perhaps you’ve heard this calling.

Remembering Our Connection Through Co-Creative Partnership with Nature

While we may never be able to move to our ancestral Lands or maybe not even be able to visit them, we can reestablish our roots and re-member our innate connection to Nature. We are reminded of our inherent connection, our belonging, when we engage in co-creative partnership with Nature. That is when we recognize that all of Nature is alive and intelligent and work with our more-than-human kin for the benefit of all. As we take up our sacred role as co-creators, our homesickness subsides. We realize that we have never really separated from Nature. We are Nature. We belong. We belong to the Land.

Nature is calling us back into relationship. Wanting us to come Home.

So how do we engage in co-creative partnership with Nature? Co-creative partnership with Nature can take many forms. Like I say, when there is a need, Nature provides many solutions. (You can read here how we engage in co-creative partnership at Heart Springs Sanctuary.) There is no one way to re-member your connection. Below are some of my favorite ways for re-establishing your roots and healing homesickness through co-creative partnership with Nature.

Practices for Belonging

• Make a commitment. Commit to being in relationship with Land. It is often easiest if you are the physical steward of this Land. However, you can make that commitment to any Land that is calling you. Once the commitment is made, you may want to spend regular time simply being with this Land. Or perhaps, you hold ceremonies there to mark important times of the year. You may take responsibility for the care of this Land. If you are not the steward, this may mean picking up trash or singing to the Land. Or if you are the steward, perhaps there are areas that need cleaned out or Plants to be planted.

• Create a sit spot. Have a place where you sit regularly, ideally daily, to simply observe and commune with the Land. While there, notice your surroundings. Who do you see? How does this place change with the seasons or from year to year. What sensations do you feel? What thoughts or images surface? Know that as you visit this area again and again, you are creating energetic ties.

• Learn how to communicate with Nature. I find the easiest introduction is through Plants. Hence my book, Communicating with Plants; however, we can communicate with any and all aspects of Nature. Communicating with Nature strengthens our relationship. It opens us to an incredible source of wisdom and Love. And also helps us understand what the Land and our more-than-human kin want.

• Get to know the Beings who you share the Land with. Who are the Plants that grow there? Are they edible or medicinal? Who are the other residents, the winged ones, the four-legged, the insects? Do they stay year-round? When do they arrive? How can you create more habitat or food for them? What do they need? Who are the ancestors of this Land? How did they engage with the Land? How did they refer to the local landmarks? Is there anything that they need? Get to know the microclimates and subtle energies of the Land.

“Before making major decisions or changes to the Land consult with the Land and/or your allies. Ask what Plants they would like. Ask what area(s) you should focus on. Ask what is needed.“

• Give offerings. When in doubt give an offering. Really, give offerings as often as you can. Nature provides us with everything that we need, the least we can do is give an offering. Offerings do not need to be physical objects. They could be songs, dances, action. I tend to give the Faeries at Heart Springs Sanctuary offerings of port and sometimes chocolate or something else decadent. While traveling I encountered Faeries who would not accept food as an offering. They wanted coins. It is nice to ask what the Land or Nature Spirits would like for an offering. When in doubt, give something that has meaning to you. Offerings of the Heart are the most powerful.

• Connect with a Plant ally. We all have Plant allies who are incredible guides for us, we just might not know who they are. The key is that these allies want to be in relationship with us. Once we are able to identify them and connect/communicate with them, a whole new world opens to us. This relationship with our Plant ally is life-long. I like to think that my ancestors adorning themselves with the Plants of their clan was a way to ask the Plant Spirit to protect and guide them (especially since they often wore their Plant badges in battle).
  
  
• Ask for an ambassador. When moving to a new place, ask for an ambassador to help introduce you to the Land and more-than-human kin. This ambassador can help you get rooted in this new place. My clients often find that Trees are willing ambassadors. If in doubt, look for the largest/oldest Tree close to you and try to connect with ki daily. Align your spine with ki’s trunk and ask ki to help your roots to grow.

• Consult the Land. Before making major decisions (for yourself or the Land) connect with and consult the Land and/or your allies. Most definitely consult the Land before making changes to ki. Ask what Plants they would like. Ask what area(s) you should focus on. Ask what is needed. 

• Engage in ceremony. There are so many ways in which we can engage in ceremony to honor our connection with the Land. Ceremony can be so simple: infusing water with words of Love and offering this water to the Land. Ceremony can also be elaborate: bringing a group together to bless the Land for Beltane. If you connect with the Land, ki can help to inform your ceremony. Two of my favorite ceremonies for re-membering our innate connection with Nature are Sacred Plant Initiations and Council of All Beings.
  
  
  • Plant Initiations focus on connecting with a specific Plant ally. They are usually 2 or 3 days long and include fasting as well as a special elixir made with the initiating Plant. Through ceremony, the Plant helps to expand our consciousness and facilitate our evolution, reminding us that we are intimately connected. During the ceremony, we often merge with the Plant so that we carry their energy with us always.
    
    
  • Council of All Beings is a process created by Joanna Macy and John Seed. Through this process, we each embody an aspect of Nature. We come together in council to share the messages of the Beings we are embodying. It is an incredibly powerful and moving experience to embody our more-than-human kin as well as to hear what our other relatives want to share. A modified Council of All Beings is part of the HEARTransformation Apprenticeship and is often included in Sacred Plant Initiations.

While this is a somewhat long list of ways to remember your connection to Land and reestablish your roots, there are so many other methods. Like any good relationship, connecting to Nature and the Lands where we live is a life-long process that evolves and deepens. Good relationships require attention and intention. Though we often find when we invest our Love into nourishing our relationship, we get much more in return.

It is exciting to see the many people who are actively re-membering their connection to Nature. This gives me great hope for our future. I wonder what life would be like if we all identified ourselves with a Plant. Who would you chose as your Plant badge? Or maybe a more accurate question is, which Plant would chose you to represent ki?